The Thousands

Recall that episode of the Simpsons where Lisa explains that pork, bacon and ham all come from the same animal? Homer replies: “Right Lisa, some wonderful, magical animal!” Press* allows you to grasp how truly wonderful and magical a pig actually is. If you have the foresight, the friends, and the pieces of cash, you probably ought to order the whole half roast suckling pig at 24 hours notice. It’s the kind of meal that comes less from your dreams than from your deepest, creepiest fantasies involving said half pig, a young Helen Mirren and a monkey playing a musical saw.

Those of you who fancy less of a Greenaway type excess should definitely try some of the smaller options like the kingfish carpaccio, the beef tartare, or the skate salad. These are delightful little meals that give you the feeling of making out with a cloud. Other mains, like the obscenely crispy pork belly, or the six-hour braised brisket with mac and cheese are not too pricey but are more than filling. Even my friend’s Cambodian parasite was sated after an encounter with one of these.

The wine list is extensive, and the décor has an industrial/heritage theme, allowing you to swill and scoff like some kind of Dickensian industrialist right on Waymouth street. The term ravenous comes to mind in the sexiest possible way.