The Thousands

Imagine if headphones were a cruel scam and that every time you put them on, everyone else on your train carriage could listen in and raucously dissect your simplistically pretentious taste in music. Imagine! Wouldn’t that be just awful? Wouldn’t it? No it goddamn wouldn’t. Why? Because your taste in music is freaking awesome and any peon that snickers otherwise can eat your shorts in hell.**Which brings us to the Yuento Music Balloon. Basically it’s a kumquat-sized speaker-pompom you dangle from your person, possibly in a kind of stylish nonchalant manner. It plugs into the headphone jack of any portable media device and lets you pump solid jams into your immediate surroundings with surprising volume and clarity. The press release suggests you could use one of these just about anywhere; and I’m inclined to believe it. The Yuento Music Balloon is the final word in technology you can dangle from your person.