The Thousands

I got my hands on some Crazybandz today! These are so popular in NYC right now; public schools are working on a district-wide ban. I have been hunting these puppies all over Asia, like grenades hunt the cast of Jersey Shore. I finally found them at Freedom House in Chiang Mai, a school for orphans and hill tribe kids from around the Northern Thai region. As soon as they had their backs turned, I cribbed ‘em!

What the hell are Crazybandz, anyway? Imagine the hype on Avatar. Now imagine you can floss that hype on your wrist and trade it with your friends. That’s Crazybandz. So, the big question on everyone’s mind: Are Crazybandz any good? Or are they the wristwear-fad equivalent of the flaming-zeppelin-of-juvenilia that was Avatar?

I realise the onus rests on me alone to decide if it’s cool. That’s what I have been faced with. It has been a horrible burden. Ladies and gentleman I’m pleased to say, this shit is hotter than Beyonce’s steam room. Crazybandz are rubber bands that are shaped like animals and sports equipment and stuff. You have to have them. I already do. Here is a list of just a few of the Crazybandz that I have and you don’t: Rabbit, Turkey drumstick (I think), Cheerleader, Cowboy boot, Vampire teeth, Sheep, Hippo. Jealous much?