The Thousands

If you're on the fence, or the curb, it's time to give that gutter a rest and get up. We're super excited for Lost City; a curation by our friend Brad who has pulled together the most amazing locally produced 2 day festival this weekend. Banham will teach you how to become an internet sensation just like himself. Bacon has forced Rory to change his ways. We go back with Sujini and Birth Glow to a time when we didn't exist. And Steph is still the most stylish bike rider we have ever seen and she still loves bikes. Most earnest intro ever. What's up, Larry?

Cover photo by Kat Botten. Hit us with your best shot! Send yours to daniel@rightanglestudio.com.au.

It's easy to underestimate the reality of gangsta culture, with prep school girls flashing gang symbols in Facebook photos and Blood and Crip flannelette print shoes for sale at suburban shopping malls.

Since 1979, Teen Angels has been a testament to the fact that some very real people live lives that are very different from ours. Cover-to-cover, each issue reprints handmade art from Chicano contributors. Awash with guns, lowriders, hot babes and gang paraphernalia, you can argue that it glamorises some unhealthy practices, but like N.W.A., this is also simply a case of people reporting on the world they already live in.

What's rad is Teen Angels provides a positive creative outlet; the art enclosed is obviously pored over, finely detailed with loving care. What's sad is that a lot of these drawings are from inmates, with their addresses enclosed. A lot of these images are the idealised daydreams of incarcerated individuals.

It's not all heartbreak, however; there's some humor herein (this issue's Christmas centerfold is particularly adorable). Stockists are sporadic online via eBay but have a hunt around; every issue of Teen Angels is an interesting keepsake and a glimpse into a real street subculture. And every page is a single person's chance to shine.

If y’all had the privilege of seeing Birth Glow play at any time recently, you’ve probably still got a residual sassy half-smile on your face from the night. (“This song has two endings”… “Gross”) Such is the endowment of Birth Glow, the ability to make eighteen minutes of pure musical joy linger with you for days. Their 2007 record, Ultimate Relief, is testament to this. Ellen’s puckish dulcet tones, combined with Nick’s sonorous drone and Steph’s polymathic rhythms provided by drums, guitars and even simple claps, form an album that makes you want to run through a family picnic, steal a soccer ball and throw it into an algae infested lake, then drink two litres of straight red cordial and jump on a mini-tramp until you vom.

This record is full of laconic bursts of mischievous fun, but at the same time delivers some moments of real pathos. I have never heard the words “Can I trust you to hold my Fanta?” expressed with such gravitas. I love this record, because in the drollness, there are so many moments of true vocal beauty. Check out 'Too slow', 'Transatlantic Homesick Blues' and 'Ransom' to hear what I mean. Actually, just check out the whole thing.

Off the shelf bikes are great when it comes to reliability - stories of eBay 'bargains' that fall apart on the first ride or need another $300 worth of parts and repairs are abundant. But there's something special about welcoming a well-loved two wheeler into your heart and embarking on a new life together.

Jess and Lucy at Victoria Street Vintage Bikes know this. They also know that you don't know what a derailleur is, that you don't understand how brake cables work and that you probably don't want to get your hands too dirty. They know that you want a bike that looks pretty and just works. You want to throw a bottle of wine in the basket and ride off into the sunset on it right now.

Luckily, Jess and Lucy do know their stuff when it comes to derailleurs, cables, tubes, chains and other bike-y things, and they don't mind getting their hands dirty. They know where to find all the prettiest bikes for lads, ladies and little ones, how to fix them up into perfect working order, and are even happy to take a look at your current clunky old thing if you think it's worth a second chance. Keep an eye on their Facebook page, or visit them at their market stall! If you only take one new flame home this weekend, make it a Victoria Street bike.

The palimpsestic title is a clue: Martha’s (Elizabeth Olsen) innermost identity has been blurred and desecrated by an abusive cult whose leader, Patrick (John Hawkes), renames her ‘Marcy May’, and forces all female members to answer the phone as ‘Marlene’. Seeking shelter with her estranged sister Lucy (Sarah Paulson) and Lucy’s husband Ted (Hugh Dancy), she doesn’t trust her memories yet is petrified Patrick is coming to reclaim her.

Writer-director Sean Durkin’s debut feature is subtly, almost perfectly calibrated between idyllic and terrifying, all the way to its chillingly ambiguous ending. Durkin expertly allows episodic, impressionistic scenes to unfurl and overlap, revealing how seemingly benign everyday objects and gestures have become horrible to Martha, and how her search for meaning has left her irreparably damaged.

As Martha’s behaviour escalates from merely eccentric to hysterical, Lucy and Ted struggle to help; Olsen brilliantly portrays both the opaque object of their frustration and the subject of crippling confusion and panic. Hawkes – who played Teardrop in Winter’s Bone – powerfully conjures menace from hippie-like calm. By the time he’s spouting such truly insane aphorisms as “Death is pure love”, Martha’s in way too deep to ever really be herself again.

Most concert films are crap. It’s weird because live music can be the most mind-blowing experience of your life but something about putting it on film tends to sap it of its specialness. There are of course exceptions and anyone who’s seen Burning, Parisian filmmaker Vincent Moon’s ode to Mogwai, will testify that he does things differently. Instead of cobbling together sweaty greatest hits cash grabs, Moon strives to figure out what it is that makes an artist connect with people then creates a piece of poetically paced, beautifully shot cinema about it.

With An Island, Moon has chosen the chamber pop of the stupidly talented Danish band Efterklang for his latest investigation. The film follows the band at home on the remote island of Als as they make music in unlikely places (on the backs of trucks, in rustic barns, in school halls and other generally stunning Scandinavian locations) and pieces together little anecdotes from wiry frontman Casper Clausan’s life in the town.

The best part is they get their family and townspeople to collaborate on new arrangements of the already lush and playful Efterklang songs. The genuine joy on everyone’s faces as they build the music is incredibly uplifting. It’s a beautiful statement about how songs aren’t the work of untouchable geniuses working alone; rather they’re the result of lives lived in communities that shape the players.

‘Bike people’ are a breed of their own, although not to be confused with all those ‘lycra wearing cyclists’ we’ve seen around town in recent weeks. The Hannmaid 'Two Wheel' collection of cufflinks are for modern day riders – ‘bike people’ who wear suits during the week.

Designed and made by Hannah Cross (a self confessed ‘bike person’ herself) and her crew, these bicycle cufflinks make ‘bike people’ want to breakaway from the peloton. Note: cufflinks are not performance enhancing.

The cufflinks provide touch of bling to the average ‘bike person’s’ wardrobe and are an excellent gift idea. There’s even a pendant version for female ‘bike people’. Ladies are not left out!

The teeny tiny bicycles come in a variety of different colour combinations, so you should have no trouble matching them to your shirts, ties and, alright, that collection of lyrca you keep hidden away in the cupboard. These bike accessories are sure to get a few compliments around the office, at the velodrome, or at the top of Norton Summit!

An oft-noted piece of advice: you should stand by your convictions. The benefits of following this advice are pretty clear; though you might be considered an asshole for your opinions, at least you'll be a consistent asshole and you will be doing what you want.

I've always been one of those guys, but recently I found a place called UR Caffe (pronounced 'Your Cafe'), and after stumbling through the red doors, drinking a perfect coffee and sitting on the mismatched furniture beneath exposed brick walls, I've started re-evaluating things.

Pre UR Caffe: Bacon and eggs are an artery-clogging treat reserved for curing Sunday morning hangovers, rendering a sense of deep fatty guilt. Post UR Caffe: Bacon and eggs should be had ALL THE TIME, and served with fruit on the side so you can lie to yourself about 'healthy-living'.

Pre UR Caffe: Celine Dion should be avoided at all costs. Post UR Caffe: It’s possible, after filling up with good food and coffee, to hear 'My Heart Will Go On' and let it wash over you like the heart-slowing waters of the North Atlantic.

Pre UR Caffe: Text message grammar and word compression is the spawn of Satan and should be crushed mercilessly. Post UR Caffe: Im willing 2 let dat shit slyd if da cofee is dat good. (LOL). I could go on. But I think I’ve settled on a new stance: it’s ok to be an inconsistent asshole, as long as you can recommend good coffee.

When I walk down the street I always hear the words: "Matt how do I become an internet sensation like you? How does my life become a MEME?" As a kind man I always take the time to respond to the voices in my head and perhaps you, dear reader, would also like to listen in.

A lot of memes are random events that become popular of their own awesome accord, but maybe you don't wanna sit around your whole life waiting to become heaps famous. So here is what you can do: Find a picture or video of a famous person or animal and put a caption or funny voice over it! It's as simple as that.

You can use this site or if you're heaps smart then do it all on some fancy thing like Photoshop. Impact font is the best as it has the most IMPACT. "But I'm not as naturally funny as you, Matt" you say. Well that's OK because memes are incredibly repetitive and you can also just put a slight change on what is already there.

Soon you'll be the king of your Facebook friends and people will laugh at you every time you squint. So get out there and make some ROFLs and LOLs and stop saying acronyms out loud.

Stephanie Crase of Stephanie Crase, Batrider and Birth Glow has cloned herself times three and started a band called Pinched Sphinx. Pinched Sphinx! That could be some kind of cute cheek-pinch Sphinx or the "tense and pale, from cold worry and hunger" kind of Sphinx. We don't know what the vibe will be yet, but what we do know is that it's damn hard to say and was thought up to make radio announcers stumble on air like they had a mouthful of sock, and it worked! Heh heh. Also playing are The Monies, featuring a couple of Avant Gardeners. On the basis of resumes alone this show is gonna be a good'un.

The super stylish ladies behind retro vintage online shop Claire Inc and Unley Road modern fashion haunt The New Guard are combining their powers of style this weekend for a flash pop-up courtyard sale! Joining them is neighbour Etienne, home of eclectic homewares, garments and jewels. With everything from covetable Chanel and Moschino pieces to the latest from Scandinavian minimalists Acne and wunderkind Alexander Wang, you can expect to grab a bargain with exclusive reductions just for you, so get along!

Y'know what's nice? Kicking back at the pub. You know what else is nice? Being read to. Just imagine if you could combine the two! Cue the dream sequence: musical maestro Duncan Campbell (Mr Wednesday) plays with cellist Felicity Davies as you enter the back room of the Wheatsheaf with a pint of craft beer in hand. Shortly after, a selection of Adelaide's best actors take turns to stand before you, bathed by a solitary spotlight. They read from a selection of short fiction, the words dulcetly tumbling from their mouths as if they will never speak anything else other than the prose of Tom Cho, Josephine Rowe and more, ever again. Too good to be true? Believe it!

See that empty old theatre? It's looking a little, well, lost, isn't it? If you didn't know it was tucked down Playhouse Lane you probably wouldn't even notice it. Well, this Saturday and Sunday we're excited to be finding it, and oh boy will it be filled with good things! Lost City Festival, hurrah!

Prince Rama! Doe! Love Diagrams! Galapagoose! Sparkspitter! Oisima! My Disco side project! Next Wave sound artists! Brisbane Festival presented musicians! Projections courtesy of Jayson Haebich, BIG DOS and Hal Bird! Augmented reality installations by Dr Christian Sandor! Noise, electronica, post-rock, composition, psychedelica, art, stalls... and now announcing: you!

Yes, you will be there too! Because you are about to either pop into Clothes Line Saga to snap up a ticket for the super cheap price of $30 for the two-day festival, or jump onto Venuetix to do the same, or enter our competition to see if you can score one of two double passes.

To try your luck with us, complete the following sentence.