The Thousands

A true purveyor of perve, John Waters’ prolific output is voraciously uninhibited. First introductions to his work often include Hairspray or Pink Flamingos, Cry-Baby and Serial Mom, but Waters has made a name for himself in mediums from art through writing, curation, and his moving images. There’s just way too much to tell you in this little space here.

William Burroughs called him ‘The Pope of Trash’. He’s appeared on The Simpsons. The man’s worked with almost every good person in Hollywood and still retains his morals. This Filthy World (which was made into a feature film directed by Jeff Garlin – the co-producer of Curb) features Waters talking about his admiration of sickos, hilarious situations in the underbelly of Hollywood and his prolific career. Sarah nervously had a chat with the charming man just before he went to dinner with his nephew and his nephew’s wife.

Sarah Werkmeister: Where are you living and what do you enjoy most about living there?

John Waters: Well my home is always Baltimore, where I’ve lived for my whole life. That’s where my house is, where my office is, where my studio is. But I also have an apartment in San Francisco and one in New York and I have a summer rental in Provincetown, Massachusetts and I’m coming up to 27 speaking engagements between this week and Christmas, so where do I live? I’m not sure. In airplanes! But I live in Baltimore because here we have the cutest people and the people who really aren’t that impressed with what I do. The people that know what I do, but are not always talking about that. I can have friends here that are on all different kinds of life, not just show business. Whenever I need a good idea, I come here because it’s where everyone thinks they’re normal, but I think they’re a little bit crazy which is good – it makes for an exciting lifestyle.

People are nice to me everywhere. Nobody ever really gives me trouble. I certainly have little patience for people who are in show business, who lash out when somebody takes a picture. I thought that was the point – isn’t that the reason you went into that business? Because you thought it would solve all your problems or the love you didn’t get from your parents? But guess what, it doesn’t (laughs). I never expected it to. But the people who think fame is going to in any way solve any emotional problems they have, just realise that not only does it not, but it also complicates it. Once you figure that out, you can get through life in a lovely way.

I thought that was the point – isn’t that the reason you went into that business? Because you thought it would solve all your problems or the love you didn’t get from your parents? But guess what, it doesn’t.

SW: In your book Role Models, you talk about people like Leslie Van Houten, Tennessee Williams etc – what makes someone a role model to you?

JW: That they’ve had an extreme life. That they’ve had to go through great success, great critical reaction – good and bad, that terrible thing that they did when they were very young like Leslie. That notoriety that can never be shaken, or someone who looks back on something terrible that they were a part of with great remorse, and how they could have ever made themselves a better person than back when that happened. I’m also inspired by people like Johnny Mathis, who instantly had success, and he survived that too. Sometimes you have to survive that as much as tragedy.

SW: Your quote on making books cool again has been circulating the internet a lot lately…

JW: I do believe that if you go home with someone and if they don’t have books, don’t fuck em. DVDs don’t count either. But then I said to somebody later – if they’re cute, then once in a while I’ll break that rule, but I definitely am suspicious of people who don’t have any books, and what’s worse is if you go home with somebody and they turn the television on – now that would make me really run. But each to their own. Maybe some people love television and maybe they want to have sex and talk about sitcom plots – I don’t know. I don’t need to sleep with people who read books either – I know enough smart people. I don’t need to be an intellectual in bed.

SW: So what are some of your favourite books and how do you propose books ‘become cool again’?

JW: Well, first of all, books are always cool if you’re interested in them and you read them – I have five favourite books that I talk about in Role Models, and I think I have about 9000 books – I don’t know which one is my favourite, but I’m always reading something. The worst thing ever is to go on an airplane and run out of something to read. That is when I go completely out of my mind. When you’ve read every word on the vomit bag in the seat in front of you, and the airline magazine, and the rules. I very much need to read – if I ever went blind, it would be the worst possible thing I could imagine.

Maybe some people love television and maybe they want to have sex and talk about sitcom plots…

SW: What was your favourite cartoon as a kid?

JW: Peanuts was my favourite cartoon as a kid, and I even got to write the introduction to the Peanuts anthology. I always liked the villains, so I also like The Beagle Boys – I have a picture of them in my house, hanging up.

SW: There’s an urban dictionary entry that states that a flamingo situation is, based on the plot of Pink Flamingos, a situation whereby, and I quote, “Two or more persons or groups engaged in attempting to appear worse than, or create circumstances worse than the other parties”. Now that your films have made it into common language, what word would you choose to be included in the Oxford English?

JW: Blossomed. Which is a really hideous sexual term that I do detail in my show. If you want to know what it means, either google it before you come, or come and hear the show and I will make your ears garbage cans. I wish I didn’t know this, but I feel compelled to share it with you and to get on a plane and go all around the world to tell people these kinds of hideous human behaviour that I continue to marvel at and hope you will too.

SW: You made a Christmas compilation once, and Halloween is coming up – what would you put on a Halloween mix?

JW: Well I made a Valentines Day one too – that’s called A Date With John Waters. But Halloween – well Bobby ‘Boris’ Pickett, the Monster Mash – my favourite Halloween song always. I could jump up right now and do the Monster Mash. Halloween though – it never used to be everywhere in the world. They never used to have it in London, but now they do. It’s just become a capitalist American holiday. It used to be that Halloween used to be a big gay parade, but now it’s just tourists. So I used to like Halloween, but now it’s becoming like New Years Eve – like amateurs night.

SW: Yeah – didn’t Mardi Gras originally mean…

JW: It means New Orleans. Well, they have it in Princetown as well, but once you say Mardi Gras you still think of New Orleans, which is certainly not just a gay event…

SW: Yeah I’ve been watching Treme, which shows a little bit about it…

JW: Yeah I think it’s good! It’s the same people that did The Wire. I just came back from New Orleans – I had an art show there last weekend. The only thing about New Orleans that’s tough is that it’s very hot all the time, but it’s a great town that doesn’t really participate in the rest of America. It’s a city about drinking and music – and it’s hot.

SW: Generally people know what they’re in for when they watch your films, but some people still get up in arms about the content. Do you think it’s harder to be subversive in a desensitized world?

JW: Well I just try to surprise you and take you into a world you haven’t been to and hope you’re delighted. I guess in Pink Flamingos – I mean, when we had the ending in Pink Flamingos that was to make a point at the time about censorship, when pornography had become legal, and could there be anything left that was taboo. I think Johnny Knoxville still covers that – the Jackass movies are anarchist in the true sense of the word. But I don’t try to shock – I try to interest you – I’m interested in things that can surprise me. But shock is too easy actually. It’s what Hollywood tries to do, and they’re not funny. They forget that you have to be funny too.

I don’t try to shock – I try to interest you – I’m interested in things that can surprise me. But shock is too easy actually. It’s what Hollywood tries to do, and they’re not funny. They forget that you have to be funny too.

SW: Did you hear about R Crumb canceling his trip to Australia due to some conflicting views of journalists and regards to his work?

JW: No, but I think Robert Crumb is a great fine artist – I think he draws better than anyone in the world. I don’t know why he’d care about what other people thought of him. I wish he were there when I was – we could really have fun together.

SW: What’s your favourite film that’s come out in the past year?

JW: Pedro Almodovar’s movie The Skin I Live In. It’s a crazy horror melodrama that’s really surprising and about sex changes and sordid sexual acts – it’s really good.

SW: Are you going to make any more films?

JW: I hope so, but I can’t get this one made. This children’s Christmas adventure. I’ve been having trouble, so I wrote a book. I just need ways to tell stories – if I can tell one by making a movie, I’ll make a movie, if I can do it writing a book, I’ll write a book. I’ve always got a way to tell the stories thank God.