Gertrude Studios open day

· Thursday November 24, 2011

Why everyone has to be so freaked out about art I don't know. Well, I do know. Haters gonna hate. Curators gonna curate. Everyone be actin like your mate. Once I was so afraid of an artist I spent two hours coming up with the question, “Do your sculptures pit art's fashionable atheism and the irony now embedded somewhere in all post Grunge-era conceptualism against a personal ambition to explore the sincere?” Then when I got to the gallery I went, “Hey have you seen that Jeff Koons movie?”

Last year, Brooklyn-based art journal Paper Monument published the pamphlet I like your work: art and etiquette. The editor said, “We had noticed that everyone involved in art talks endlessly about feelings of social unease…” Check it out. It's full of great advice such as, “Wait until you are at least six blocks away from a show before expressing a negative opinion about the show - this is known as the six block rule.” And, “If you're a skinny artist, be clean and neat. If you're a fat artist be crazy looking and disheveled.”

Why am I appraising you of this resource? Because Saturday is Gertrude Studios open day. The day when you're allowed to burst into the studios of the Gertrude Contemporary artists and, you know, meet them. Laith McGregor, for instance. You can meet him and ask him why he did this picture of Wilson from Castaway. Trevelyan Clay as well. Who else? Darren Sylvester, Katie Lee and Jake Walker, to name three. Or just snoop around. If anyone talks to you, quote David Lynch: “I don’t know why people expect art to make sense when they accept the fact that life doesn’t make sense!” Then run away.