The Thousands

I’m staying in New York this month and I can assure you: one thing these people love – more than Whole Foods, more than pretending they go to the Met, more than pickles from Katz’s deli – is not wearing a bike helmet. Why continue to live?! When your corpse can show East Houston Street what a quiff really looks like.

These guys are putting their skulls on the line every single day to attract potential roots while wobbling about the place on a 1973 Schwinn Typhoon Cruiser. So I feel the least we can do is buy our bike fashions from them. The best-dressed of all is Outlier – a Brooklyn-based clothing label that has re-invented pants for cyclists who hate lycra but have had enough of denim chafing. Like all the best New York retailers, Outlier is open for about one hour on “selected Saturdays” or when Chloe Sevigny rings up, but they do have an online shop.

Basically, these are the hottest pants I’ve ever seen – bike or otherwise. But, speaking in terms of the ongoing hipster / Hasid hostilities of Bedford Avenue, the Rabbi’s not going to see your punani either.