The Thousands

My favourite part of Establishment 218 is that it’s a meat fridge called Establishment 218 and they treat you like a favourite guest at The Ritz. On entry you are greeted by a merry majordomo, who will ask if it’s your first time, and then one of the staff charmers will help you don a giant Siberia-strength jacket, and open the door into a horizonless meat fridge.

There is everything in here, but mostly good things for good prices. Various cuts of fillet, seasoned lambs and sausages, bratwurst, varieties of chipolata, rumps, ribs, racks, rabbit, spatchcock, and goose. Throughout, friendly staff are on hand to walk you through all meat-related life dramas. “I’m vegetarian. What meat should I give my boyfriend if I really need to apologise about something?” was handled with confidence and flair.

Idling barbecue-hosting aspirants will be pleased to hear they’ve a Beef Baron thing going on: Tuesdays and Fridays they’ll deliver to wherever for less than $20. They sell a moderately hearty breakfast platter (it includes 15 porterhouse steaks), the butcher happily offers complimentary slicing, and there are free hams for big spenders. You don’t win friends with salad.